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Sextards.com

Each of you knows someone that is a total fucking sextard – you know, the guy (or gal) that is totally retarded when it comes to getting laid……   Well in my case, I become a total sextard after about 2/3rds a bottle of Jack – add a pretty girl to the scene and I’m totally clueless. This pic was shot at one of my parties – and I’m betting I didn’t have any pants on either  but lucky for you – the camera person saved you the agony of looking at my dong while I was in sextard mode.

Sextards

Sextard With Violet

In any case, being in porn subjects me to a lot of sextards – like the lady at Walgreens that asks why I bring in a different neighbor girl each week for the “day-after-pill”, or dumb ass wigger that thinks he’ll be the next porn superstar with his massive 5″ white-boy penis. Sure, many of the girls are sextards too. Like the time Shay first saw my huge cock and threw up her hands and said “no fucking way”, I just grinned and said, “watch me”. After ramming the entire thing in her tight little teen pussy, I looked at her and said YES FUCKING WAY, SEXTARD!

Or the time Baily showed up for a photo shoot with a yeast infection so bad that I could have had cottage cheese and peaches if I had just remembered to bring the fucking peaches. Girl, wash your cunt before a fucking nude photo shoot, SEXTARD!

And don’t forget the dumbass on MySpace that sends a girl a picture of his cock and asks if she wants to fuck – stupid fuckin move SEXTARD!

I could go on, but you get the picture.

If you want to hear more stupid shit and see tons of great porn that even a sextard can appreciate, visit sextards.com today.


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May 15, 2009 | Leave a comment | Read More »

I Hate Stupid Fuckers That Can’t Get It Up

OK – I’m an old fucking man and if you put a sweet piece of teen pussy in front of me, my dick is gonna get fucking hard. So it’s only natural that when some teen slut drags her boyfriend to me to make a porn movie, I expect the young buck can at least get his shit hard. But, surprisingly enough, most of the guys that show up to “audition” ain’t got what it takes to be in porn. It was no different when Thena brought mike for this shoot.

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Mike is a classic example but he’s far from the only one. Of the four times I let him try, he only finished twice – and both times it was a circus trying to keep his cock hard. WTF was I thinking to give him a second chance. They needed the money and in the end, Mike filmed me fucking his girlfriend so they could pay the rent – and hell, if you’re down with me fucking your girlfriend, bring her ass on by ;-)

You can see some of the limp-dick attempt and a few of the videos that we made instead of shooting the limp-dick fucking boyfriends on my two amateur sites Glass Mannequin and Real Colorado Girls. Since I’m the lucky bastard that fucks all of the sisters on Bring Me Your Sister, you ain’t gonna see any limp dicks there – although we do get a lot of porn bloopers as the brothers film their own sisters getting fucked by Mr. Richard ;-)


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August 21, 2008 | Leave a comment | Read More »

Real Colorado Girls

I just launched a new site for all of you that are tired of fake bimbos – it features real girls from the “neighborhood of make believe” – or some shit like that. In reality, it features girls that I’ve met in and near my local neighborhood – girls that like me enough to get naked and let me film them – most of them even let Mister Richard put his hard cock in them. I like nasty girls!

Real Colorado Girls

Real Colorado Girls

So if you really like teen pussy, and you like it to be fresh and clean, be sure to check out the girls from Mister Richard’s Neighborhood on www.RealColoradoGirls.com


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July 24, 2008 | Leave a comment | Read More »